Experiment #14: Meditating with an App
Does it help? I've been experimenting with meditation apps for a long time — here's what I think.
If reading time is hard to come by or you’re interested in a more human experience, there is a “Read-to-You” version of this article.
An experiment with
“M” for MEDITATE
on the
M.O.N.K.E.Y. B.A.R.S.
~
For more:
Read M.O.N.K.E.Y. B.A.R.S. explainer
Read “M” explainer
See all “M” stories
“Do you really want this?”
This was the question a Board member asked me during my interview to become Managing Director of a fast-growing, professional, regional theatre.
I had been the Marketing Director for a number of years before that and had played a pivotal role in helping the theatre professionalize its brand so that it better matched the experience of seeing one of its productions. During the process, which also helped grow the theater’s audience and revenue, I had fallen in love the theatre’s mission.
While I dreamed of possibly owning my own business one day, I was never interested in being an Executive Director or Managing Director for someone else’s. But working so closely with this organization’s story and vision at such an important time in its development, I felt a connection to it and felt I could contribute to it.
This inspired me to throw my hat in the ring when the Board began a search for a new Managing Director.
“Do you really want this?” he said. Did that Board member see something that I didn’t? Did I really want this?
The Founder, who was also the Artistic Director, and I had developed a strong bond while I served as Marketing Director. He became my enthusiastic champion as soon as I decided to apply to be his co-executive.
Shortly after that, I was hired.
After I got the job, I threw my heart and soul into it. I worked long hours learning the parts of the organization that I was less familiar with. I prioritized the job over other parts of my life that I would later realize were critical to my well-being — things like music and time with family.
At the end of the first year, I felt proud, for sure. A lot had been accomplished. I had had the courage to step waaaaaaay outside of my comfort zone — almost on a daily basis. The theatre had broken numerous box office and fundraising records. The Board was happy, my co-executive seemed happy, and I had hired an administrative team that I was proud to lead.
But something was wrong. I had never felt exhaustion like this. Was it even exhaustion? I had never felt so incapable of re-charging. I had never exerted so much will power towards appearing confident and comfortable in situations where I felt the complete opposite.
That summer after the first year in that job was a real eye-opener for me. It was the first time I really took a breath and reflected on it since I had started.
It’s when I first read Susan Cain’s ground-breaking book, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking, and learned for the first time that I was definitely an introvert.
I was ashamed at first of this. The Managing Director required so much extroverted activity. I was so ashamed that I wrote the Founder/Artistic Director a lengthy apology because I felt I had misled him and the hiring team.
His graciousness, compassion, and support assuaged my guilt and persuaded me that I, as a newly-identified introvert, could, in fact, do this job and do it well.
But that Board member’s question — “Do you really want this?” — kept ringing in my ear.
In light of my new discovery, I resolved that summer to make some changes to how I approached the job so that I could better support my introverted nature.
One of the biggest things I did was I committed to start meditating regularly. I didn’t really know how to start a meditation habit, but I believed the effects (which I describe in Experiment #2: Meditating) would help me recharge and reduce anxiety. (And, boy, I had no idea just how beneficial meditation would turn out to be.)
That said, the idea of sitting in silence by myself felt too strange (at the time). So, I went to my iPhone’s App Store and did a search. I found an app called Calm. Perfect. That’s exactly what I wanted.
I downloaded it and began my new experiment: meditating with an app.
The Calm app
I loved so much about the Calm app. The first thing I loved was that when I opened it, there was a sound of soothing water — as if I were sitting next to a lake. It’s one of my favorite sounds in the world.
There were many guided meditations. Looking back over my history, it looks like I did ones called:
Deep concentration
Returning to Now
Daily Calm - Joy
I liked that they had multi-day programs that built on the previous day. I probably did more of these than any other type of meditation. Some examples:
7 Days of Calm
21 Days of Calm
7 Days of Gratitude
7 Days of Self-Esteem
7 Days of Letting Go of Anxiety
7 Days of Happiness
These programs essentially helped me set an intention, long before I had started formally experimenting with that (see Experiment #8: Building an Intention).
I liked the app so much that I bought the book, Calm, written by the app’s founder, Michael Acton Smith. It’s a beautifully-designed and thoughtfully put-together companion to the app. (Totally recommend it!)
There were also many meditations for sleep that looked good, though, admittedly, I didn’t really use those. As my wife will tell you, I don’t need any help sleeping. They did, however, help my oldest child from time to time.
Despite all of these wonderful features, somewhere along the way, I stopped meditating.
Meditation, like any habit, can be tricky to establish. There is a whole science to what makes habits stick (one fascinating book I’m currently reading on that topic is James Clear’s Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones).
I’m not sure what exactly led to my pause in meditating, but I do think, at the time, the Calm app didn’t have the kind of habit-building features that it probably does now. Plus, it was expensive to maintain and since I wasn’t using it, I unsubscribed, which only made it easier to not meditate.
Pros and Cons of the Calm App
PROS
Beautiful design that can instantly have a calming effect
Helpful educational materials that teach you about meditation as you do it
Great multi-day guided meditations
CONS
Less habit-building features (at least at the time)
A little pricey for the good stuff
The road back to meditation (long story, very short)
After three years, I had my answer to that Board member’s question — I didn’t really want that job.
Could I do that job, yes. But especially at the time, I did not have the habits in place that could help me do it without feeling burned out, irritable, unconfident, and fearful. I didn’t yet know how to do a job like that and stay balanced and creatively fulfilled.
When I presented a plan to essentially step back into the Marketing Director role, the Founder/Artistic Director was, again, gracious and supportive — as was the Board.
In the weeks leading up to my first day back as Marketing Director, I started re-prioritizing habits that would support my well-being and creativity.
When I re-committed to meditating, I turned to a different app called Insight Timer and I have not turned back.
The Insight Timer app
Great stuff for free
It’s the #1 free meditation app for a reason.
Not gonna lie, this was probably the biggest draw Insight Timer had for me at the time — they just have so much of the good stuff for free.
Super customizable — bells, ambient sounds, presets, and so much more
Like Calm, Insight Timer has countless guided meditations available. But by this time, I had grown comfortable with — and preferred, actually — silent meditation.
Insight Timer has some very cool features to support this — the best of which is the ability to create custom timers, intervals, and chimes and save them as your own presets.
The bell sounds alone are enough to make me want to use this app, honestly. They’re top of the line. You can choose which bells ring at the beginning, end, and sometimes in the middle of your meditation. It’s pretty fun to play with!
The flexibility to create presets also comes in handy. Sometimes I only have 3 minutes, sometimes 12, sometimes longer, sometimes random amounts of time, so I like the ability to create a consistent experience.
Another cool customization option is that you can add a bell, say, 5 minutes before the meditation ends so you know it’s almost over. I use this all the time.
You can also add ambient sound into the meditation (though I tend not to do this).
There’s lots to explore and sometimes it’s just fun to customize. It makes it feel like our own.
My current set up is:
Starting Bell: Dengze bell
Interval Bell(s): Basu bell, once, 9 minutes before the end
Ambient Sound: None
Ending Bell: Kangse bell
Habit-building tools
Insight Timer has done a good job of gamifying meditation, which can be very helpful when you’re trying to build a habit.
You earn stars, you’re awarded badges for certain milestones, and they keep track of any streaks you have so that there’s just a little extra incentive to keep going.
Sometimes we can use all the help we can get when we’re starting a new habit. This definitely helped me. Plus, it’s also really cool to look back see all you’ve accomplished.
Community
Insight Timer also has done a great job of having it feel like you’re meditating with other people.
After you’ve finished meditating, they tell you how many users around the world just meditated with you and show you which of your friends are currently meditating (or recently finished meditating). It also shows you which of your friends are nearby.
You can then tap their profile and send a quick pre-written message that thanks them for meditating with you. It’s simple, and you get a lot of these, but it’s also kind of nice. It’s another little thing that helps make the habit stick.
If you decide to join Insight Timer, find me under Jonathan Waller and let’s be friends!
Great quotes!
I love a good quote! There was a time back in the days of Blogger when my wife and I collected our favorites and put it in a blog called Borrowing Wisdom. It’s also why I love my “second brain” system that I created in Apple Notes that I’ve mentioned on this Substack a couple of times.
Insight Timer has pulled some great ones that emphasize mindfulness and yoga philosophy. They can add a touch of inspiration to your day.
You can have it show you one when you open the app, but you can also that option off if you’re not into it.
I find that I often screenshot them so that I can return to my favorite ones later or add them to my “second brain.”
Mood Tracker
I also love that they have a mood tracker built in. I used it for a while and only stopped because I ended up building my own custom system.
Tracking the relationship between how often/how long I meditate and my mood has been very interesting to me. It essentially proved to me the value of meditating.
My data shows, not surprisingly, that the more frequently I meditate, the better my mood is. It’s literally there in the data. What’s cool is that you can create your own data set and prove it to yourself!
Lots of other stuff!
They also have courses and yoga instruction and a journaling function — there’s so much. And a lot of it is free.
Pros and Cons of the Insight Timer App
PROS
So much free!
Great design
Super customizable with beautiful starting and ending bells plus the ability to create your own presets
Habit-building tools
A feeling of community
Helpful educational materials (like quotes, courses, and more)
Guided meditations
Mood tracker
CONS
None, really
Do you need an app?
You don’t need an app. You can sit quietly and meditate anywhere. I’ve done it. It works.
So why use an app? I think the most important thing when using an app is: does it help you meditate? For me, when it comes to building a habit and analyzing data and creating a great experience, the apps that I have tried have really added quite a lot.
There are other apps I’ve heard good things about like Headspace and Waking Up, but I haven’t spent much time with them. Frankly, I haven’t found a reason to stop using Insight Timer.
And so, my experiment continues. I’ll update you if I try another app or something changes.
But until then, I’m curious, do you have a meditation app that you love? Which one? Which features are most important to you? What’s been most helpful in building the habit? I would love to hear about your experience. If you’re comfortable, drop a comment below so we can all benefit.
Thanks for stopping by and I hope you have a very happy day!
With love,
Jonathan